The War on Christmas has found its way to my own town. Even to the institution that will assist in the education of the young miss next year. No matter that they called it a winter tree. But as I heard about the story, I found other reasons for objection:
1. It was donated by WalMart, therefore it promotes the spirit of economic Christmas, not real Christmas.
2. They called it a pine tree, but it was really green plastic. Long live real trees.
3. It was decorated in cardinal red and gold, more the colors for a community that promotes the spirit of athletics, especially male-participation sports, and less for the actual colors of Christmas.
4. It was in the lunch room at the high school. Another prop for bullies to torment geeks.
5. It was in the lunch room at the high school. Another place to hide inedible food.
6. Christmas lights waste energy.
7. The Ames High School used to call it Mistletoe Dance. We can’t have any of that silly romance. Or paganism.
8. Trees are just pagan anyway. Good riddance.
9. This was just going to open it up to student-atheists playing the vuvuzela … just when we’ve all forgotten about soccer.
10. No angels or Jesus.