Maybe people misinterpret that a renewal of choice implies a thought of not renewing. For whatever reason, the notion of renewal is sometimes avoided. It might be especially important to engage that renewal when forces from outside or within a marriage threaten:
238. In such situations, some have the maturity needed to reaffirm their choice of the other as their partner on life’s journey, despite the limitations of the relationship. They realistically accept that the other cannot fulfill all their cherished dreams. Persons like this avoid thinking of themselves as martyrs; they make the most of whatever possibilities family life gives them and they work patiently at strengthening the marriage bond. They realize, after all, that every crisis can be a new “yes”, enabling love to be renewed, deepened and inwardly strengthened. When crises come, they are unafraid to get to the root of it, to renegotiate basic terms, to achieve a new equilibrium and to move forward together. With this kind of constant openness they are able to face any number of difficult situations. In any event, while realizing that reconciliation is a possibility, we also see that “what is urgently needed today is a ministry to care for those whose marital relationship has broken down”.(Relatio Finalis 2015, 78)
For your reference, remember that Amoris Laetitia is online here.
When I was getting trained as a coach almost a decade ago, there was something of a fetishisation of active choice. Instructors tried to finesse the issue of the very idea of permanent commitments (to spouses, children, et cet.), and never seemed comfortable with the idea that people’s power of active choice includes deciding to fulfilling permanent commitments. For a group of instructors whose operating credo was “What you fear is what runs your life”, there was an underlying fear of having a broken, violated or unfulfilled commitment being judged to be broken, violated or failed…. (At times, one could see the unfortunate residue of est/Forum/The Secret/Law of Attraction crap.)