Here’s a point of advice for those who aspire to holiness:
116. Inner strength, as the work of grace, prevents us from becoming carried away by the violence that is so much a part of life today, because grace defuses vanity and makes possible meekness of heart. The saints do not waste energy complaining about the failings of others; they can hold their tongue before the faults of their brothers and sisters, and avoid the verbal violence that demeans and mistreats others. Saints hesitate to treat others harshly; they consider others better than themselves (cf. Philippians 2:3).
The corollary is that the disciple chooses to have mercy on others, while holding herself or himself to a high standard. The saints illustrate this hesitation. If a holy challenge is forthcoming, it is usually carefully approached, and always with the desire that the companion will wake up, make amends, and outstrip the virtue of the one who seeks correction.