241. Those involved in planning the funeral rites for a deceased child should take into account the age of the child, the circumstances of the death, the grief of the family, and the needs and customs of those taking part in the rites. In choosing the texts and elements of celebration, the minister should bear in mind whether the child was baptized or died before baptism.
Good reasons all for having a number of choices within the rites. As always, what is to be taken into account is not the preferences or tastes of the minister, but the authentic need of the mourners.
Catholic Sensibility 
My lone pastoral experience with this situation was that the family was too stunned to plan anything– I ended up choosing everything.
Just a heartbreaking situation.